Thursday, January 10, 2013

Happy Anniversary Mom and Dad



My folks were married for 57 years when my dad passed away in 1999. They were married in a tumultuous time when the country was at war. How many young men and women tied the knot after knowing each other for just a short time for fear the war would claim the young man's life and rob them of their chance at happiness, even if it was for just a little while.

My mother wore a borrowed wedding dress and my dad a rented a tuxedo. There are only two photos that I know of, commemorating their special day. The one below and a tiny black and white snap shot folded and faded which may have accompanied my dad to sea during WWII.

There is no video, no film, no leather bound wedding album...there was a party, but the only way I know this is through a reference my mother made to it in a war time letter she sent to my dad.
         
Weddings, for my parents' generation and demographic, were family celebrations, not an opportunity to impress the neighbors or cause to empty the family's bank account.

My parents borrowed a car and drove to Niagara Falls, NY for their honeymoon. They likely stayed at a small motel catering to economically modest war time couples. My father got his orders to ship out just a few days later.

When I succumb to watching ridiculous reality shows about making a couple's "wedding dreams come true" I can't help but wonder how many of those couples' marriages  will survive 57 years...a three year war time separation, with only a few censored letters as communication...mortgage payments, kids, unemployment, illness...Will they enjoy 57 years celebrating holidays, birthdays, weddings, vacations and outings to the beach? They may, but the odds are not in their favor...and the perfect wedding dress and fabulous reception will not increase their chances for success.

My parents did not have a perfect marriage, far from it! But they did hold it together, for better and for worse...and for that I admire them.

Happy 71st Anniversary Mom and Dad

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